Besides the grief of losing a loved one, I believe that rejection and betrayal are the hardest things we face as human beings. We may feel rejected by loved ones for our lifestyle, or by the boss who didn't give us the job or promotion, or by friends who we desperately wanted acceptance from. We may feel betrayed by a spouse or by a person who didn't keep up their end of a promise to us.
And when we suffer from rejection or betrayal, it stings. Hard. And even thinking about times in the past when we've been hurt in this way still brings up those little prickly feelings inside of us. Feeling rejected and betrayed often brings out the worst in us. Somehow, it brought out the best in Jesus.
I read the story of Jesus' arrest from Matthew 26:36-56. As I read, I marveled at how Jesus stood strong while all of his followers fell away. How did he do it? I can't even handle if someone blows me off for dinner, and Jesus called Judas friend after Judas turned him over with a kiss. A kiss. A sign of affection that Jesus knew was the ultimate betrayal. And Jesus replies in verse 50, "Do what you came for friend."
Right before this, Jesus had spent time praying. I'm guessing Jesus' time praying looked fairly different than my neat and tidy prayer time where I sit with my coffee and my Bible and journal. Jesus goes to a quiet place and has a conversation with God, knowing that God is asking him to be killed for the sins of all people for all of history and all of the future. Talk about pressure. Jesus is distressed and begs God to let this story go a different way, but he ends his prayers with "not my will, but your will be done."
Jesus knew the will of God. He knew what scripture said and he knew he was sent to earth to fulfill God's plan. And he prayed that God's will be done. His strength in facing Judas and the arrest that followed came from knowing he was executing God's plan. He didn't need his friends to use their swords against those coming to arrest him. He knew that God was going to fulfill a bigger purpose. And Jesus faced those people and didn't fight back.
And then, as he was being arrested, his disciples abandoned him. Matthew 26:56 ends with, "then all the disciples deserted him and fled." His closest friends. The ones who followed him around, learning from him and doing life with him--the ones who left everything they had to follow this man named Jesus without really knowing what they were getting themselves into--they deserted him as he was being arrested.
I know that this fulfills what the prophets said. And I know that if I were a disciple I would've done the exact same thing; I won't blame them for jumping ship. I can't imagine what they were all feeling and going through and how confused they must have been, even though Jesus foretold what was going to happen to him. But this verse stopped me in my tracks. Because there have been times I've felt deserted by those closest to me. And I'm guessing you have too.
We all face rejection and betrayal. Hopefully not to the extent Jesus did, the kind that leads to death. But sometimes it feels that way. The question is, how will we react? Will we still find the strength to walk in the will of God? Will we remain true to Jesus and to the plan that he has for our lives, or will we falter and flounder and let that rejection become our identity? How do we remain strong?
Just like Jesus, we keep praying for God's will be done above all else. We keep our eyes on the one who can save us. The one who loves us better than anyone else and doesn't reject us no matter what we do. We look at the one who loves us perfectly and who says we are complete in Christ and that nothing will ever separate us from his love. We cling tight to him, knowing that he is mighty to save and that he will rescue us from whatever mess we've found ourselves in, even if we made that mess. Just like Jesus is resurrected, he will resurrect us. It might not look the same. He might not fix what we ask him to. But he will resurrect us. He will make us new. He will give us strength to keep going, even in the face of betrayal and rejection.
